That’s right, true love is in the making on Bachelor in Paradise! Let’s see how this ends for our couples!
It’s the final day in paradise, which means the couples have to decide if they want to persue these relationships outside of the show. As in no cameras. As in not getting paid to do this. So it’s a real conversation to have. If they do want to try, they get a date with a fantasy suite card.
Lacey and Daniel are first to make the plunge- their motives are definitely more fantasy suite themed.
Derek and Taylor are a no brainer for the date.
Then there’s Christen and Jack Stone. Christen is a virgin but she’s no dummy. she knows what a fantasy suite means. And she isn’t signing up for that, because she’s more of an acquaintance with Jack, you know, because they’ve known each other for 4 days. Jack doesn’t understand how Christen isn’t ready to go live their magical life together. So the serial finger and Scallop Fingers are the first couple to bite the dust.
Everyone acts like this is the most extreme decision ever that they definitely could never change in a week after they’re out of paradise.
Tickle and the Strangler are the next couple to split. Boi bye.
Adam and Raven are a little hesitant, but are going to keep going forward. It’s like a rational way to think about these things.
Diggy can’t wait to see what goes down with Dean and D-Lo, me too, me too. D-Lo is definitely down for the relationship to continue. But let’s remember the other half of this relationship. Dean. Dean who sucks. REALLY REALLY SUCKS. He lets D-Lo know that he loves Kristina, and wants to walk away from paradise separately. Welp, Dean is at least consistent with being a giant douchebag. So let’s just never see or talk about him again.
Diggy and Dominique are up next! And they’re going to go home separately. Impressed by the amount of couples not forcing relationships upon themselves. Oh wait, Diggy isn’t going home with Dominique because Jaimi is here. And that’s who he is picking. But Jaimi isn’t picking him. So all three of them get to go home alone.
Time for Robby and Amanda. Remember when he threw glowsticks in the pool for her? That’s how you know it’s real. Amanda isn’t really sure though, because remember last year when this exact same thing happened with her and douchebag Josh, and that obviously ended really well. Amanda seems really close into falling back into her old, broken patterns, but she rallies and says no to Robby. YAY!
We have our final three: Derek and Taylor, Adam and Raven, and Lacey and Daniel. I can only guess which of these ends up in an engagement. (Oh wait, I totally know).
Lacey and Daniel are up first, they are on the same page, they want to change their facebook status to “in a relationship.” This is a big step. They obviously take advantage of the fantasy suite.
Derek and Taylor are continuing on their incredibly boring and blah relationship. Still don’t know how Derek stands having to listen to Taylor’s voice all the time.
Adam and Raven use their time to make out and have a deeper connection. But Raven doesn’t want to be vulnerable, bets say she’s going into that suite.
Because we can’t have anything nice, we get a “live” finale with Chris Harrison and the cast. And Corinne. Because let’s talk about this some more. Corinne would love to see DeMario, as if she had a choice. DeMario’s therapist has been his “homie” throughout this process, I can only hope it’s not Taylor. The air has been cleared, we can hopefully move on from this.
But we can’t move back to the actual show. We get to discuss Scallop Fingers because that’s everyone’s top priority. Kristina gets to talk about how much D-Lo sucks, Dean butts in to say it’s all his fault. Which it is, but we’re not falling for your crap Dean.
Dean gets to be in the hot seat, and boy does he like nauseous, maybe because he’s stupid. Kristina is not stupid, and great, and will always have a special place in her heart for him. D-Lo has some info, after they left Dean called her. OH SNAP DEAN. You still suck. He says sorry, don’t believe it, don’t care. Go home Dean.
Amanda and Robby are next. We learn that Amanda ate avocado toast every morning. So they left paradise and were dating, and now they are not dating. The twins say he cheated on her, and Robby disagrees. Amanda calls him out and boy is Robby guilty. But it’s fine because she’s smart enough to not be with him, and can eat pizza again.
It’s finally time to address the final 3 couples. I wonder which ones are still together?!
Daniel and Lacey go first, from the fact that Lacey just came out alone, I’m thinking it didn’t end well. (GASP). Lacey and Daniel were actually friends before the show, I feel so lied to. The past tense Lacey is using, isn’t boding very well. In the fantasy suite Daniel confessed that he wasn’t actually in love. We get to see the actual morning after and it is not pretty. Daniel admits that he was never going to change his facebook status! OMG! He does have a valid reason, that he wasn’t sure if they were going to be a couple after 5 days. But after the show Daniel went to New York to hang out with Lacey, but in reality to hang out with Vinny. So we are 0 for 1 on our first couple.
Adam and Raven come on stage together, I’m hazarding a guess this worked out well. They are totally ready to make it facebook official. They even say the “L” word to each other. AWWWWWWWW. Chris Harrison is just so freaking happy that his show isn’t a total disaster. Raven is going to meet Adam’s family next week, Adam gets to meet Raven’s family right now. Because why not?
It’s time for the last couple- Derek and Taylor! Their love story is so boring no one really cares. Especially with the very thinly veiled innuendos because Taylor got to “take in a lot of Derek” NOPE NOPE NOPE. Okay fineeeeeee. I’m a sucker for a proposal. And we all knew it would be them. But this is genuine and cute and AWWWWWWWWWW. And there’s even a Neil Lane diamond.
Well there you go, you can find love on Bachelor in Paradise.